Review of “The Pit and the Pendulum” (1961)

trailer from YouTube

The past Saturday pizza and bad movie night was a return to the schlock of yesteryear.

Plot:

In the sixteenth-century, Englishman Francis Barnard (John Kerr) arrives at a foreboding castle seeking news about his sister Elizabeth’s (Barbara Steele) recent death. His sister’s widower, Nicholas Medina (Vincent Price), and his younger sister, Catherine (Luana Anders), give him a chilly reception. The only explanation they offer him for his sister’s death was something about “blood disease.”

While Barnard accepts that Nicholas is indeed mourning Elizabeth, there’s something rotten in Spain. He wishes to see where she’s buried.

A visit from Nicholas’ friend, Dr. Leon (Antony Carbone), brings the news that Elizabeth died of heart failure. She was scared to death.

Thoughts:

The movie has barely a nodding acquaintance with Poe’s story of the same name, which is about a prisoner of the Spanish Inquisition undergoing a fantastic series of tortures, including being strapped to a table while a blade swings ever so lower over him. It scared the daylights out of me when I first read it at about eleven.

The movie adds characters and a whole story not in Poe’s work. The old castle, the torture chamber, the memories of past agonies the Medinas’ father Sebastian (also played by Vincent Price) inflicted on his victims, and the depictions of an angry sea pounding against the rocky shoreline surrounding the castle give the tale a heavy, gothic air.

Nicholas comes to believe his dead wife is haunting him. Barnard comes to believe Nicholas is a few sandwiches short of a picnic. What is he hiding? Is this ghost business some elaborate ruse? Why does he keep those torture devices beneath the castle?

(Note to the history buffs: the Spanish Inquisition did not use the instruments shown in the movie. They had much simpler ways of torturing, maiming, and killing people. But the reader has probably figured this movie isn’t a documentary.)

Vincent Price is enjoyable to watch in his overacting, first as the loving, grieving husband, then as the nut, then—while screws continue to come loose and fall away—as the dangerous nut.

Yet true vengeance is reserved not for him but for another and arrives straight from the Department of Ironic Punishments.

This is over-the-top from beginning to end in a way that one can imagine Poe thinking, “Hmmm. Yes. Wish I’d written that.”

The Roger Corman/Vincent Price movies are not for everyone, but I find them a delightful guilty pleasure not to be taken seriously.

This can be watched with a whole slew of ads on Tubi:

Or on the Internet Archive:



It can also be rented on places like Amazon TV, YouTube, and Apple TV.



Title: The Pit and the Pendulum (1961)

Directed by
Roger Corman

Writing Credits
Richard Matheson…(screenplay)
Edgar Allan Poe…(story “The Pit and the Pendulum”)

Cast (in credits order)
Vincent Price…Nicholas Medina / Sebastian Medina
John Kerr…Francis Barnard
Barbara Steele…Elizabeth Barnard Medina
Luana Anders…Catherine Medina
Antony Carbone…Doctor Charles Leon

Released: 1961
Length: 1 hour, 20 minutes

Review of “Godzilla” (1954) and “Godzilla King of the Monsters” (1956)

Trailer from YouTube

I. Godzilla (1954)

In 1954, a Japanese film appeared with a monster named Gojira—Angelized as Godzilla—that terrorized people near the (fictional) island of Odo near the Japanese coast, destroying ships before taking on Tokyo. Survivors describe their disasters: “It was like the sea exploded.”

The people of Odo Island see their fishing nets come back empty. The elders say Godzilla is eating the catch, though younger people laugh at such tales.

A traditional dance takes place. An elder says that in the old days, when the fish disappeared, they would put a young girl on a raft for Godzilla.

ICK.

That night, a storm hits and wreaks terrible damage, more than one would expect from a storm. Something moves out there.

And viewers get their first glimpse of a huge dinosaur-like tail in the dark disappearing around a corner.

After the islanders apply to the authorities for disaster relief, a research team arrives from the mainland: Professor Kyohei Yamane  (Takashi Shimura), his daughter Emiko Yamane (Momoko Kôchi), and Ogata (Akira Takarada), a Marine Salvage specialist with the Coast Guard, romantically attached to Emiko. This last bit is a wrinkle for her fiancé, the research scientist Dr. Daisuke Serizawa (Akihiko Hirata), to whom she has been engaged since she was a child.

Um, ICK.

Serizawa saw the party off at the dock. He wears an eyepatch—a war wound—but even with one eye, he sees what’s going on with Emiko and Ogata. Mrs. Serizawa didn’t raise no fool.

On the island, they find footprints big enough for humans to stand in. Their Geiger counters go nuts.  Godzilla puts in an appears, poking his head over a hilltop the islanders have fled to.

In Tokyo, there is discussion: how do the people prepare for Godzilla’s arrival? Soon, the old lizard himself emerges from Tokyo Bay, ripping through the defenses, stomping on trains, smashing buildings, and sending people running.

Dr. Serizawa has developed a terrible weapon that can be used to defeat Godzilla, but he is reluctant to do so. What if it falls into the wrong hands? Dr. Yamane, on the other hand, wants to study Godzilla. What makes him immune to radiation?

For a monster flick, the themes are surprisingly profound, and the ending poignant. The monster is something humans have been able to live with more or less but supercharged with the blasts of nuclear experimentation, it can now ravage whole cities. And the cure may prove worse than the disease.

From Youtube

II. Godzilla: King of the Monsters (1956)

The anti-nuke message of the original Gojira was deemed too strong for an American audience in 1956, so it was toned down. Much of it was cut, and a Western actor, Raymond Burr (before he took up law), was added to the film, playing the part of journalist Steve Martin who happens to be in Tokyo at the time of Godzilla’s attacks.

Instead of the attack on the Japanese freighter, the movie opens with scenes of destruction in Tokyo and Martin recovering enough to stumble to a hospital, where he meets Emiko Yamane. He travels with her and her father to Odo Island, sleeping in a tent when the storm and Godzilla hit.

He spends a lot of the movie observing things, often against backgrounds different from the rest of the actors. For example, in the scene where the Yamanes and Ogata depart for Odo Island, everyone stands at the ship’s railing, waving to those on the dock—everyone except Steve Martin, who stands in front of what might be a white bulkhead by himself, observing.

The damage to the village on Odo Island and the destruction of Tokyo still figure large in this movie, as do the love triangle and the poignant ending. Both feature Japanese high school girls singing “A Prayer for Peace.”

From YouTube



The American version is still a powerful movie, but it lacks some of the wrinkles of the Japanese version. For example, Professor Yamane’s wish to study rather than kill Godzilla does not appear in the American version that I could see. American audiences at the time were probably also unaware of the 1954 tragedy of the tuna-fishing vessel Daigo Fukuryū Maru (Lucky Dragon No. 5), whose crew was exposed to fallout from an unexpectedly large blast from the Bikini Atoll experiments (Castle Bravo). The scenes depicting a blinding light and a churning ocean would recall the incident to 1950s Japanese.

While the dubbing in the American version is great, there are passages of Japanese spoken by minor characters that remain untranslated. For example, while Godzilla makes mincemeat out of Tokyo, there is a shot of a woman crouching, holding her small children close. What she says to them is not translated. In the Japanese version, the subtitles read, “It’s okay, children. We’ll be with Daddy soon.”

Which movie is “better”? Hard to say. But certainly, the Japanese version has elements the American version left out. I enjoyed both of them. I enjoyed watching Raymond Burr observe stuff. Yet the Japanese version offered more food for thought.




Review of “The Lady Vanishes” (1938)

trailer from YouTube

The Lady Vanishes is a British mystery thriller directed by Alfred Hitchcock on the eve of the outbreak of World War II.

Plot:

In the fictional European Alpine country of Bandrika, an avalanche has delayed a train and forced a varied group of people to find rooms in a small local hotel. Wealthy English Iris Henderson (Margaret Lockwood) is vacationing with a couple of friends before returning to England to get married. Caldicott and Charters (Naunton Wayne and Basil Radford) are two British gentlemen concerned about making their connection on time so they can go to a cricket match. Another guest, Miss Froy (May Whitty), is returning to England after working as a governess in the country for some years. She speaks the local (fictional) Bandrikan language and loves its music.

The hotel and the area appear very much like a Swiss Alpine skiing resort, with mountains, snow, and skiers. The hotel manager, Boris (Emile Boreo), easily switches from Bandrikan to Italian, French, German, and English.

Miss Froy and Iris have rooms next to each other and find their sleep disturbed by Gilbert Redman (Michael Redgrave), a musicologist on the floor above playing the clarinet and studying local folk dances, complete with folk dancers. Iris bribes the manager into throwing him out.

Miss Froy listens to a singer playing a guitar. Hands appear to grab the songster by the neck and strangle him. Not seeing this, Miss Froy throws a coin to the musician.

The next morning, when Iris stands at the platform, chatting with her friends about to board the train, Miss Froy approaches them and asks for help finding her carry-on. While they look over the luggage from the hotel, a hand pushes a potted plant off the roof. Though clearly intended for Miss Froy, it lands on Iris’s noggin. She’s stunned but insists on getting the train. Miss Froy assures her friends she’ll look after her. Iris passes out.

When she comes to, she’s sitting in a compartment opposite Miss Froy. Four other people who don’t speak English also occupy the compartment. Iris and Miss Froy go to the dining car for tea. Miss Froy brings her own brand.

When they return to the compartment, Miss Froy encourages Iris to take a nap. She does so and wakes up to find her new friend gone. The others tell her there was no English lady. She went to the dining car by herself.

Why would someone disappear a harmless old governess?

Thoughts:

What follows is a nice little mystery. When Dr. Egon Hartz (Paul Lukas), a brain specialist, comes along, he has Iris all but convinced the bump on her head made her hallucinate Miss Froy. But then Miss Froy reappears in her proper tweeds. But it’s a different woman (Josephine Wilson).

Is Iris losing her mind?

In her search, she comes across Gilbert Redman of the squeaking clarinet. He’s not convinced there was a governess, but he can see that Iris is distressed and agrees to help her. In their poking around, they come across real danger.

Things get even more out of control near the end of the film, with soldiers lined up along the road offering to be of service.

Hitchcock makes his trademark cameo, but I missed it.

This was a fun movie with an intriguing mystery and genuine menace. There are a few see-it-comings and one obvious blunder—nothing suspicious about a nun wearing high heels. Geez, some poor planning there, doncha think?

We got our copy from the library. The audio and visual were nice and clear especially for a film of this age. I don’t know if it’s been restored or whether we were just lucky.

Overall, this was a fun flick.

The movie was adapted from a 1936 mystery thriller novel, The Wheel Spins, by British crime writer Ethel Lina White. It was remade in 1979 and again in 2013.

Hitchcock won the Best Director Award from the 1938 New York Film Critics Circle. The film was nominated for Best Film.

The movie can be watched here or on many subscription services.



Title: The Lady Vanishes (1938)

Directed by
Alfred Hitchcock

Writing Credits
Ethel Lina White…(based upon the story by: “The Wheel Spins”)
Sidney Gilliat…(screenplay) (as Sidney Gilliatt) and
Frank Launder…(screenplay)

Cast (in credits order)
Margaret Lockwood…Iris Matilda Henderson
Michael Redgrave…Gilbert Redman
Paul Lukas…Dr. Egon Hartz
May Whitty…Miss Froy (as Dame May Whitty)
Cecil Parker…Mr. Todhunter
Linden Travers…”Mrs.” Todhunter

Released: 1938
Length: 1 hour, 36 minutes

Review of “Godzilla Minus One” (2023)

trailer from YouTube

I’d been waiting to see this one for a long time. Everyone I know who’d seen it told me it was a great movie. Long story short, it did not disappoint. It is more than a Godzilla movie.

Plot:

Near the end of World War II, kamikaze pilot Kōichi Shikishima (Ryunosuke Kamiki) lands his plane at the repair base on (fictional) Odo Island. Lead Mechanic Sosaku Tachibana (Munetaka Aoki) tells him the crew can find nothing wrong.

“What are you implying?” Shikishima asks and storms off to sit by the beach. He notices deep-water fish rising to the surface.

Tachibana approaches. “I’m on your side,” he says. “Why die honorably when the outcome [of the war] is already clear?”

OUCH.

That night, Godzilla comes ashore and attacks the installation. Tachibana tells Shikishima to fire on the monster with the 20mm guns in his plane. Shikishima runs to his plane but freezes. He and Tachibana are the only survivors. Tachibana understandably is furious. He later gives Shikishima a packet containing the personal pictures belonging to all the lost men.

Shikishima returns to a devastated Tokyo, where he learns his parents were killed in the bombings. Upon recognizing him, a neighbor, Sumiko Ota (Sakura Andô), tells him, “Weren’t you a kamikaze? If you had done your job, my children wouldn’t have been killed.”

Almost accidentally, Shikishima finds himself setting up a household with a woman, Noriko Oishi (Minami Hamabe), and a baby she rescued. The neighbor who yelled at him now helps them raise the child because they are helpless.

After working several low-paying jobs, Shikishima comes home to say he’s found a good one with good pay—aboard a wooden minesweeper. What could go wrong?


Thoughts:

Many years ago, I read a science fiction story whose main character came to believe—however reluctantly—a god had been born of the nuclear bombs dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. I will never remember the title or the author’s name.

The movie doesn’t claim that, but it speaks to how fundamentally the bombs rocked Japanese society. The locals around out-of-the-way Odo Island know Godzilla. When they see deep-sea fish come to the surface, they know Godzilla will follow. Radiation from American experimentation with nuclear power after WWII supercharges him to the point where he can overturn aircraft carriers. His fire-breath sets off explosions that look very much like atomic mushroom cloud. Conventional weapons are useless against him.

The devastation at Odo Island haunts Shikishima. He wakes screaming from nightmares. The theme of his personal redemption runs through the movie, beginning with the unconventional family that just sorta happens. He cares for them but cannot let himself show affection to them. He tells the child not to call him “Daddy,” for example. Later, he has a chance to face Godzilla.

Another theme is that of the common people, G. I. Takao war vets (so to speak), redeeming themselves and saving Japan from destruction when Godzilla strikes. Neither the Japanese nor foreign governments offer much help, so the people must go it alone. The people’s army also cares for its members. Unlike those under the Imperial Army, no one is expendable.

This is a different Godzilla movie, but it pays homage to history. Odo Island was Godzilla’s home turf since the original in 1954. Generally, the movies are about the monsters. Human stories are minimal. Like the original (particularly the Japanese version of the original), it offers anti-war and anti-nuke messages.

It garnered fifty-four nominations and thirty-eight wins, including 2024 Best Film and Best Screenplay from the Japanese Academy.

We watched it on Netflix. The English dubbing was excellent. There are also English subtitles. It’s available to rent or buy on places like Google TV or YouTube. Some services may not have the English dubbing, however.

All in all, a fine flick.


Title: Godzilla Minus One (2023)

Directed by
Takashi Yamazaki

Writing Credits (in alphabetical order)
Ishirô Honda…(original creator) (uncredited)
Takeo Murata…(original creator) (uncredited)
Takashi Yamazaki…(screenplay)

Cast
Darren Barnet…Koichi Shikishima (voice)
Nelson Lee…(voice)
Ell…Noriko Oishi (voice)
Minami Hamabe…Noriko Oishi
Ashley Peldon…(voice)
Ryunosuke Kamiki…Koichi Shikishima
Zeno Robinson…(voice)
Kagga Jayson…Boy #5
Sakura Andô…Sumiko Ota (as Sakura Ando)
Greg Chun…Tachibana (voice)

Released: 2023
Length: 2 hours, 4 minutes

Review of “Scream Blacula Scream” (1973)

from YouTube

This week’s Saturday pizza and bad movie was a return to the cheesy flick of yesteryear—a vampire pic to boot.

Plot:

The film opens with the death of voodoo adept Mama Loa. Her son Willis Daniels (Richard Lawson) then claims her place. Others tell him it’s a matter of voting. A favorite is Mama Loa’s adopted daughter, Lisa Fortier (Pam Grier). Willis leaves, furious, and buys bones he intends to resurrect for revenge like a golem or a zombie, except it’s a vampire.

Silly boy. He has to know something’s going to bite him in the rear end, maybe not literally.

At first, nothing seems to be working, so he sits in the living room and drinks a beer, the brand label fully visible. (product placement?)

While he’s going over in his mind what went wrong, a shadow moves in the other room. A hand grasps the back of his neck, and soon, two fangs sink into poor Willis’ neck.

Oh, bummer. Looks like that revenge thing’s a bust.

Later, Willis, in a suit my mother would describe as “wearing colors,” asks Blacula/Prince Mamuwalde (William Marshall) why he can’t see himself in the mirror. A man has to see his face. He explains that he is going to a party. His girl is coming. His friend Justin Carter (Don Mitchell) will be displaying his African artifacts. Willis doesn’t mind being a vampire and all, but he’s still gotta go out, right?

Blacula explains a few things. Willis doesn’t leave the house without his permission. And what’s this about African artifacts…?

In a surprise to no viewer, Blacula crashes Justin’s party and proves himself the expert on the artifacts on display—first-hand knowledge. As the partygoers start dropping like flies, Blacula meets Pam. He realizes she’s powerful in voodoo and charms her. He has a plan. Could she, you know, maybe unvampire him? She agrees to try.

Thoughts:

This is a sequel to 1972’s Blacula (reviewed here). In the 18th century, African prince Mamuwalde fell victim to the vampire Dracula, who cursed him to always hunger for human blood. The prince’s wife was cursed with him. He was uppity enough to demand an end to the slave trade.

Like the earlier film, the is a blaxploitation flick. While these films provided expanding roles for black actors, they often came with their own set of stereotypes.

The first movie had Blacula trying to win over his reincarnated love, his wife. This one has him conflicted about his vampirism while, at the same time, killing people with seeming abandon, including the guy who brought him back to life. He soon has his own little army of the undead, dressed in the flower garden colors of early 1970s style.

In one odd, amusing scene, a lady of the evening walks up to Blacula and asks if he wants some company. When he doesn’t answer immediately, she gets frustrated and stomps off. Hey, time is money, ya know? Her two pimps then walk up to Blacula, insult his cape, and then things get ugly. He lectures them on enslaving a sister and instantly makes the sister a free agent.

I wouldn’t call this film Academy Award material, but it was fun. The first movie was, in my seldom humble opinion, superior, but this is still worth a view.

Its strength lies in the acting chops of the actor playing the main character, William Marshall. He’s tall with a deep voice and a commanding presence. With a background on stage—including Shakespeare—he can come across as suave and sophisticated or menacing with equal force.

The ending is ambiguous. Clearly, the producers planned a sequel that never came to pass.

Scream Blacula Scream was nominated for a 1975 Golden Scroll Award for Best Horror Filmby the Academy of Science Fiction, Fantasy & Horror Films.

This movie can be watched here with a whole lot of ads.

It’s also available to rent or buy on subscription services like amazon or Apple TV.

Title: Scream Blacula Scream (1973)

Directed by
Bob Kelljan

Writing Credits
Joan Torres…(screenplay) &
Raymond Koenig…(screenplay) and
Maurice Jules…(screenplay)
Joan Torres…(story) &
Raymond Koenig…(story)

Cast (in credits order)
William Marshall…Blacula / Prince Mamuwalde
Don Mitchell…Justin Carter
Pam Grier…Lisa Fortier
Michael Conrad…Sheriff Harley Dunlop
Richard Lawson…Willis Daniels

Released: 1973
Length: 1 hour, 36 minutes
Rated: PG

Review of “The Philadelphia Story” (1940)

clip from YouTube

Back home and back to our Saturday pizza and bad movie. We gave the usual monster movies a break and watched the classic The Philadelphia Story, a movie neither of us could remember seeing before.

Plot:

C. K. Dexter Haven (Cary Grant) is packing the car with his worldly goods. Tracy—Mrs. C. K. Dexter Haven (Katharine Hepburn) has asked him to leave. She’s had enough of his drinking. While “helping” him, she hands him his pipe caddy, complete with pipes. It somehow lands forcefully on the ground. She sends his golf bag flying and breaks a club over her knee. Irritated at the petty destruction, Dexter pushes her back through the front door and onto the floor.

Two years later, Tracy, of the fabulously wealthy Lord family, is planning her wedding to nouveau-riche George Kittredge (John Howard). Her father (John Halliday) won’t be there. Her parents separated unofficially over the matter of a dancer. But then he does show up.

However, through the machinations of the owner of the gossip magazine Spy, reporter Macaulay “Mike” Connor (James Stewart) and photographer Elizabeth “Liz” Imbrie (Ruth Hussey) will be attending the wedding, posing as friends of Tracy’s brother, who lives in Argentina.

Providing cover for Mike and Liz is Dexter, Tracy’s ex-husband, who will also be attending.

Tracy’s little sister Dinah (Virginia Weidler) looks forward to seeing Dexter, as does their mother (Mary Nash). Dexter even refers to Mrs. Lord as “Mother Lord,” as if she were still his mother-in-law. Woah. Support much?

Tracy realizes “her brother’s friends” are reporters, which she only tolerates after a threat to expose her father’s indiscretions. Yet she sees that Mike is a serious writer, only taking this job to keep body and soul together. She admires him but accidentally-on-purpose ruins Liz’s camera.

So, the night before the wedding, she has three men circling her: her fiancé, her ex-husband, and the reporter. She gets uncharacteristically drunk after the pre-wedding dinner and goes for an innocent-enough swim with Mike. Both Dexter and George witness Mike carrying the smashed Tracy to her bedroom.

And they aren’t the only ones watching.

Thoughts:

The Philadelphia Story is a romantic comedy adapted from a play of the same name written by Philip Barry. It was remade in 1956 as High Society as a musical with Louis Armstrong providing the music. In 1995, The Philadelphia Story was selected for preservation in the National Film Registry.

Perhaps because of the film registry, the copy we got from the library was clear, and the dialogue was easy to understand, especially for a movie so old.

There are genuinely funny scenes in it. When George tries to mount a horse, the horse walks away while he has one foot in the stirrup and another in the air. He tells “Bessie” she seems worried.

“Maybe that’s because his name is Jack,” quips Dinah.

Also, the awkwardness of husband #1 inviting himself to his ex-wife’s wedding permeates the rest of the action. Cary Grant’s Dexter is so cool. He hasn’t forgotten his pipes or his golf club. He shows no animosity toward the new guy, someone he knows but considers beneath Tracy.
 
However, he has some unresolved issues with his old flame, and he—the erstwhile drunk who pushed her down—lectures her on how cold and unforgiving toward imperfection in herself or another human being she is. She wants to be worshipped from afar.

Hmm…. Is there a reason anyone, man or woman, must accept a physically abusive person who has an addiction—even if that abuse was “minor”? One might choose to do so for various reasons, but where does it say that it is a requirement?

Her father lectures her on how having an affectionate daughter keeps a man feeling young and, therefore, without a need for philandering. Huh? So her father’s stepping out with the dancer was her fault?

Tracy eventually sees the light and makes the right choice. Or something.

If I’d been writing the movie, the ending would be something like having Tracy cancel the wedding, but hey—we’ve got everyone here. The caterer and the staff have worked hard. Let’s have a non-reception party. The next day, Tracy can start looking for a job.

The movie garnered eight awards and eleven nominations, including a 1941 Academy Award nomination for Best Picture.

I liked a lot about this movie. There was some sheer silliness in it that was just plain fun. But I felt an underlying vein of misogyny that I can’t ignore.




The movie can be watched on Tubi with a whole slew of ads:

or on the Internet Archive:

Part 1:

Part 2:

It can also be rented or bought at places like YouTube, Amazon, and AppleTV.

Title: The Philadelphia Story (1940)

Directed by
George Cukor

Writing Credits
Donald Ogden Stewart…(screenplay)
Philip Barry…(based on the play by)
Waldo Salt…(contributing writer) (uncredited)

Cast (in credits order)
Cary Grant…C. K. Dexter Haven
Katharine Hepburn…Tracy Samantha Lord
James Stewart…Macaulay “Mike” Connor
Ruth Hussey…Elizabeth “Liz” Imbrie
John Howard…George Kittredge

Released: 1940
Length: 1 hour, 52 minutes

Mother’s Day: a Rant

Image by Tran Thanh from Pixabay

Last night, I dreamed several of my closest friends died.

I’m at the point in life where I attend memorials with increasing frequency and weddings hardly at all, but the dream was not about that. It was about a Mother’s Day visit with family. We are not close. There are no bad feelings that I’m aware of. We just don’t talk outside of holidays and the occasional birthday.

About six weeks before the visit, the younger of my two sisters (sister #2) texted me that she and the other siblings were gathering in Tucson for Mother’s Day, which is about an eight-hour drive for my husband and me. This sister was coming from Alaska, so I can’t say I was coming from the greatest distance.

Our mother is 83. She, my brother, his wife, and their daughter live in Tuscon. Our father died young. My sisters’ father and Mom divorced many years ago, and she never remarried. My sisters’ father died some time ago. I had not spoken to him in some thirty years.

Mom lost her older sister (with whom she lived when she first immigrated to the U.S.) a long time ago. Both her brothers are now gone also. Her parents died before she left her native country.

When my husband and I arrived at the hotel in Tucson Friday evening, hot and tired, I texted Mom, my brother and his wife, sister # 1, her wife, and sister #2—the one who’d sent the invitation. We had plans to visit the Air and Space Museum early Saturday. They would visit the Farmer’s Market. Rather than go out on Sunday—too many other people with the same idea—my brother’s wife would host a lunch at their place.

On Saturday morning (not too early), I texted that we’d probably be done with the Air and Space Museum by 11 and asked what the plans were. “Should we meet at Mom’s?” I suggested.

“We are at the Farmer’s Market,” sister #1 texted. “I’ll text when we are leaving.”

That was the last I heard from her.

“We’ll text when we leave here,” sister #1’s wife texted. “We’ll find a place to meet.”

That was the last I heard from her.

At 12:42, I texted, “Back at the hotel watching the Weather Channel. Any news?”

Crickets chirped.

I gave up and texted my brother to ask what time the Mother’s Day lunch was the next day.

“Twelve o’clock noon,” sister #1 texted back.

My husband and I went to lunch at a nice Mediterranean restaurant and returned to the room again. We checked out the pool at the hotel, as the temperature was in the 90s. Unsupervised kidlets had the run of the place. We returned to the room, watched TV, and had dinner at the hotel. We caught a biopic of Marie Curie.

Outside of a friend of my brother’s who invited me to dinner as a joke, thinking I didn’t know he was in town, none of the family contacted us. Yeah, pretty damn funny.

I was steaming. We’d booked a hotel room and driven eight hours, only to sit around while the family was out somewhere partying. Uh, yeah. Thanks for the invite.

We did make it to the pool Sunday morning before the kidlets took over. For a while, we had it to ourselves.

We attended the Mother’s Day lunch and socialized, catching up with almost everyone. My mother said having everyone together was the best Mother’s Day. We left after a few hours—the first to bow out. I thanked my brother and sister-in-law for their hospitality. We returned to the hotel room and watched a little more TV while packing up.

We left early the next morning for our eight-hour drive without talking to the family.

I’m glad we went. It meant a lot to my mother. She won’t be around forever.

But hell (or maybe Tucson) will freeze over before I return to Tucson.

Review of “The Man Who Killed Don Quixote” (2018)

trailer from YouTube

We watched an oddball film for our Saturday pizza and bad movie night, a sad movie that dealt with dreams, fantasy v. reality, guilt, and a bit of insanity.

Plot:

The movie opens the line: And now… after more than 25 years of making… and unmaking.

The viewer first sees a storybook of Don Quixote and Sancho Panza riding along the road. “I was born by the special will of heaven in this age of iron to restore the lost age of chivalry,” the narrator says.

Don Quixote (José Luis Ferrer) and Sancho (Ismael Fritschi) ride up a path. As the mist clears, Don Quixote spies a giant.

“It’s a windmill,” Sancho says.

Don Quixote rides full till at the windmill, getting his lance caught in one of the blades. He’s carried aloft.

“That’s a wrap,” says an off-camera voice.

A caption on the screen reads, “Shooting a commercial… somewhere in Spain.”

Later, at a working dinner, the director Toby (Adam Driver) notices a local (Óscar Jaenada) selling a copy of a student movie he made ten years earlier, The Man Who Killed Don Quixote.

The Boss (Stellan Skarsgård) (I guess the guy who is in charge of financing the movie?) tells him he’s going away for a while and wants him to look after his wife Jacqui (Olga Kurylenko).

Toby agrees, thinking he can watch his old black-and-white student film in her suite. She wants sex and sets out to seduce him. Once he tears his eyes away from the screen, he’s willing enough. Unfortunately, the Boss comes home at an inopportune time. Toby barely gets away with his DVD.

He continues watching the film in his room. In one of many odd sequence changes, the viewer sees Tody interview the cobbler Javier (Jonathan Pryce), trying to talk him into playing Don Quixote, speaking to him in poor Spanish. He also recruits Angelica (Joana Ribeiro), the fifteen-year-old daughter of the innkeeper,

He realizes the place they’re currently working is near where he made the student film, Los Sueños (= “dreams”). While the crew is setting up, he borrows (commandeers?) a motorcycle and heads off alone.

In short, he finds that his student film ruined the lives of both Javier and Angelica.

Thoughts:

The movie is long and profoundly sad on many levels. Elements of the absurd also abound, however. At one point, Toby and the young man who sold him the copy of his film have been arrested. Javier arrives on horseback, believing that he is Don Quixote and that Toby is Sancho Panza, and attacks the squad car they are riding in, demanding that Toby be released.

Now, there’s something you don’t see every day.

The movie plays with timelines and reality. Toby later falls into a cave where he finds the corpse of a horse with a saddlebag full of pieces of gold. He stuffs his pockets full of the gold. But is it still gold in the light of day?

In one sequence from the black-and-white student film, a smiling Dulcinea holds a cup of water out to a thirsty Don Quixote. She spills it, then disappears. The sequence is short but says a lot.

Adam Driver is excellent as Toby. He portrays him as arrogant in the early parts of the movie then often confused and guilt-ridden later on. He shows compassion for the apparently insane Javier, even when Javier, convinced he’s Sancho Panza, treats him like a servant and refers to his “peasant” sensibilities.

Jonathan Pryce makes a great Don Quixote—and a great cobbler. He’s credible in both roles and, just as the literary Don Quixote was sincere and delusional, so is his character. I don’t know whose idea it was for him to wear his helmet crooked, but it works well.

The story is hard to follow in places. Sometimes, not everything makes complete sense, at least not on the first go-around. Despite genuinely funny situations and lines, there is an underlying sadness throughout the movie, which the ending does not redeem.

This film received five awards and twelve nominations from various European film academies and festivals, including two Goya Awards and three nominations from the Academy of Cinematographic Arts and Sciences of Spain.

I can easily recommend this film for adults. It takes some thought and is not something to watch when you’re in the mood for a bit of light entertainment, though there are plenty of funny moments. Nevertheless, if you’re in the mood for a flick that leaves you with questions and sadness, this is it.


The movie can be streamed here: Watch The Man Who Killed Don Quixote (2018) Online for Free | The Roku Channel | Roku

Title: The Man Who Kill Don Quixote (2018)

Directed by
Terry Gilliam

Writing Credits
Terry Gilliam…(written by) &
Tony Grisoni…(written by)
Miguel de Cervantes y Saavedra…(novel)

Cast (in credits order)
José Luis Ferrer…Don Quixote (commercial)
Ismael Fritschi…Sancho Panza (commercial) (as Ismael Fritzi)
Juan López-Tagle…Spanish Propman (as Juan López Tagle)
Adam Driver…Toby
William Miller…1st AD – Bill
Will Keen…Producer

Released: 2018
Length: 2 hours, 12 minutes

Review of “Argylle” (2024)

Trailer for Youtube
Yeah, it is that silly.

This was a break from our usual Saturday night pizza and bad movie. It was an amalgam of Romancing the Stone, The Kingsman, a little bit (perhaps unintentionally) of Get Smart, and a dash of The Sopranos.

Plot:

Dressed in a dark green Nehru jacket, suave Agent Aubrey Argylle (Henry Cavill) approaches several elegantly dressed women sitting in a booth in a nightclub. He asks one to dance, knowing full well she is the enemy Agent Lagrange (Dua Lipa).

During a rather bizarre dance over a Medusa’s head on the floor, Lagrange lets Argylle know she knows who he is, pulls a gun on him, and demands he disarm. (Where did she conceal her piece in that rather revealing dress?). She snaps her fingers, and the entire night club pulls out their handguns.

Oh, didn’t things go south in a hurry.

Argylle speaks into his watch, asking his partners, Keira (Ariana DeBose) and Wyatt (John Cena), for help. The space fills with fog and gunfire. A car chase through narrow winding streets of a Greek seaside city follows. Keira is shot. Wyatt and Argylle nab Lagrange.

While the three drink coffee at a café, Lagrange poisons herself before she reveals who she’s working for. Wyatt and Argylle realize they’re working for the same corrupt people and break off communications with their bosses. Argylle wonders who he can trust…

Echoing his words is mild-mannered author of spy novels, Elly Conway (Bryce Dallas Howard), reading the conclusion of her fourth Argylle book at a reading. One fan notes that other spy novel authors, such as Ian Fleming, were actually spies. Is she?

“Of course not. I’m a writer. But that’s what I’d say if I were a spy.”

Later, at home, she discusses the fifth novel with her mother (Catherine O’Hara), who reads all her books. Mom doesn’t like the ending. There should be more, she says. She doesn’t like the cliffhanger and urges her to come up with more.

Elly gets on a train (she hates flying) with her cat, Alfie, to visit her mother. Much to her dismay, a guy with long hair and a beard (Sam Rockwell), sits across from her, claiming to love cats. He’s reading one of her books and soon realizes she matches the author pic. He mentions that his line of work is “espionage” and tells her what her books get right and wrong. Another little tidbit is that her books seem to predict events. The good guys, for whom he works, and “the Division:”—the bad guys—have both noticed. There are people who will do her harm.

She believes none of it until a fan walks up to her and asks her to sign a book with a pen that turns into a knife.

A fight ensues involving nearly the whole train. Elly’s new friend, Aiden, is victorious, bursting out of the back of the train, holding onto Elly with Alfie in a backpack and soaring over the landscape in a parachute.

Elly passes out.

Thoughts:

…so, a spy novel author writes novels that seem to predict things in the spy world. The good guys and the Division (I guess “Kaos “was taken?) want her to figure things out? The fighting is over the top. My dearly beloved expressed sympathy for the stunt people—and there were a lot of them. I have to echo that. Punches and kicks and falls and knife wounds abound. Only the bad guys die, however. Sometimes, the good guys bleed, but it’s generally only flesh wounds.

The movie is also more than two hours long and full of twists and turns. At the same time, a lot of it is transparent. Not all of my predictions turned out to be correct, but the surprises were few and far between. It left me, as a viewer, with the feeling of been-here-before.

And poor Alfie the cat was quite put upon. I realize that in most scenes where Alfie suffers, things one would never inflict on a cat are CGI. Nevertheless, I wouldn’t blame him if he packed up his kibble and catnip and left for greener pastures.

Having said all that, to enjoy this movie, do not take it seriously. It is a spoof. It is people playing. I’ve read reviews of people saying it’s the worst waste of time ever, that the leading actress is just not right for the part, etc. I see these as unnecessarily harsh. Not everyone is going to like any movie, of course. I found the woman playing Elly Conway just fine. She has to switch many different roles and moods—MacGyvering a pair of ice skates with knives, for example. We won’t discuss the probability of skating on crude oil, however.

The movie is silly. The fights are frequent and preposterous. The solutions are unlikely and convoluted. And there is too little of Samuel L. Jackson.

I rolled my eyes at parts of the movie, chuckled at some of it, and found it all deeply silly. An Easter egg-ish bit midway through the credits features a young agent Argylle and ties this universe to the Kingsman universe. According to Wikipedia, two more Argylle movies are in the works.

It’s hard for me to make a recommendation. If this sounds like something you would like, you will probably like it. If it doesn’t sound appealing to you, it probably won’t work.

Because the movie is so recent, streaming it for free is unavailable. You can watch with a subscription to Apple TV or rent or buy it (for a mere $19.99!) at places like YouTube, Amazon, or Google Play, according to Justwatch. YIKES! Maybe the local library has a copy.

Title: Argylle (2004)

Directed by
Matthew Vaughn

Writing Credits
Jason Fuchs…(written by)

Cast (in credits order)
Henry Cavill…Argylle
Daniel Singh…Armed Guard #1
Dua Lipa…Lagrange
Ariana DeBose…Keira
Richard E. Grant…Director Fowler
John Cena…Wyatt
Bryce Dallas Howard…Elly Conway
Chip…Alfie the Cat
Samuel L. Jackson…Alfie

Released: 2024
Length: 2 hours, 19 minutes
Rated: PG-13

Review of “Three Amigos!” (1986)

trailer from YouTube

Our latest Saturday night pizza and bad movie was one my dearly beloved had seen, but I hadn’t. It was a silly flick with a silly premise.

Plot:

I’ll preface this by saying that my Spanish is shaky on a good day, so those who speak it better than I do (and there are many), feel free to correct me.

In 1916, Carmen (Patrice Martinez) goes in search of someone willing to help deliver her village from the evil bandit El Guapo (“the handsome one,” Alfonso Arau), who is extorting protection money from its good people. She wanders into a movie showing the adventures of “The Three Amigos,” silent film heroes who rescue the helpless and defeat the oppressor. For some unfathomable reason, she gets the idea they are real and sends them a telegram to Hollywood, California, asking them to help her village of Santo Poco (“Saint Little?”).

Because she doesn’t have enough money for the entire telegram, the operator whittles it down to an easily misinterpreted message.

Meanwhile, in Hollywood, the Three Amigos—Lucky Day (Steve Martin), Dusty Bottoms (Chevy Chase), and Ned Nederlander (Martin Short)—are busy being fired by the studio. They are also evicted from their studio housing. In this situation, they receive a telegram, apparently inviting them to a town in Mexico to put on a show or maybe make a movie with someone named El Guapo. What have they got to lose?

In the meantime, a German pilot, wearing his headgear, enters a cantina also looking for El Guapo. He easily kills several patrons, then tells the bartender he’s expecting friends. He hopes they’ll be treated with more respect than he was.

When the Three Amigos swing into town, dressed in the (stolen) costumes and enormous sombreros, the cantina patrons assume they must be the German’s friends. Thinking they’ve been recognized, the Three Amigos perform a song and dance number for those assembled.

Fortunately, Carmen sees them and brings them back to Santo Poco, where they’re treated like heroes.

Thoughts:

First, this is silly. El Guapo and his band of bad guys are violent thugs, but they also like hanging out and drinking tequila. El Guapo’s number two is named Jefe (Tony Plana). “Jefe,” if memory serves, means “boss.”

For El Guapo’s birthday, the boys of the gang string the courtyard with pinata. They chip in and buy him a present—a sweater. He’s delighted. The Three Amigos try swinging in on the lines holding the pinatas up. Their fates vary, but all are equally improbable.

One scene early on has the Three Amigos performing in a silent movie, complete with greasepaint, exaggerated expressions, and intertitles, whipping bad guy hind end and saving a damsel in distress. It doesn’t last long, but I found the sheer goofiness of it one of the funniest in the whole movie.

Another oddball scene is when the three set out looking for El Guapo and spend the first night in the desert, sleeping on the horses’ saddles. Ned spooks at hearing a coyote howl. The other two start singing “Blue Shadows on the Trail” (written by Randy Newman) to put him at ease, and he doesn’t bat an eye when other animals—a mountain lion, a coyote—appear. A desert tortoise vibes alone with their lullaby for Ned.

Steve Martin wrote part of the movie along with Randy Newman, who wrote several of the songs used in it.

While I enjoyed the silly parts—and they abounded in this flick—I couldn’t quite buy some of the basic ideas. Why would Carmen think the Three Amigos were heroes rather than actors? Why was El Guapo extorting the poor people of Santo Poco for protection money? They didn’t have any money. No one ran any businesses to speak of. There was one cantina. Were they paying him in chickens?

If you can overlook the plot holes and the parts that didn’t quite make sense, this movie is a lot of fun. The abundant silly parts help the viewer ignore the parts where the seams don’t exactly match.

Overall, I liked the movie.

The movie can be watched here on Tubi with a whole slew of ads or rented here on YouTube.





Title: Three Amigos! (1986)

Directed by
John Landis

Writing Credits
Steve Martin…(written by) and
Lorne Michaels…(written by) and
Randy Newman…(written by)

Cast (in credits order)
Steve Martin…Lucky Day
Chevy Chase…Dusty Bottoms
Martin Short…Ned Nederlander
Alfonso Arau…El Guapo
Tony Plana…Jefe
Patrice Martinez…Carmen

Released: 1986
Length: 1 hour, 44 minutes
Rated: PG